Our Journey home

On Monday, May24th, Jett's doctor came in to his room and said, "Remember when I told you that his light bulb would go off and he would be on the fast track to going home?"...."The time has come, your departure should be Wednesday!"

After she gave me the news, the day flew by. All I could think of was, "Our house isn't ready!" I left the hospital to get a move on. Joel worked that day, but would be off for the next week. He came home after work and got busy cleaning, disinfecting, and preparing with me.

In all of the chaos, there was a sense of relief. After almost three months in two hospitals, we finally get to experience what bringing a new baby home feels like. There are no words to describe the feeling of having a baby and leaving him at the hospital.

Tuesday, his checklist was being completed. His circumcision (which by the way really opened the doors to pain for him...now he cries), his vaccines, nutrition instruction, and final exams took place very quickly. Jett was ready to go!

Anticipating this week's events, Jett's Uncle Mac came by to help me install the carseat and give us the stroller that Dexter has already outgrown.

Jett's success and Gratitude

Jett is one strong, little boy! Over the past three weeks, his job was to eat and grow...and poop too! He has had a difficult time figuring out how to suck, swallow, and breathe all at the same time, but is now completely able to do it on his own. He pulled his own tube out of his nose and they just decided they might as well leave it out. He really is adorable, but even more with that tube off of his face.

We have a few more steps to climb before they kick us out, but we're on our way. Joel and I would really like to say "THANK YOU" to our friends and family. Without you helping us through Jett's difficult journey, we wouldn't have made it! From your kind words, to prepared meals, to giftcards, and just texting your thoughts, it has all been very powerful and humbling. You are all amazing and I hope you all get to watch Jett be the best he can be!

The other side of the hill...

After a long three weeks, our time at REX will soon be ending. It is truly bittersweet. I think Joel and I are both ready to bring Jett home. It's obvious from my lack of posts that we are not as connected to REX as we were to Duke. I'm not sure if that's because we're just exhausted or if we know that we will all be home soon. I have to say that I feel disconnected from almost everything. We are both tired.

The nurses at REX are very sweet, and they seem to love Jett. I'm not sure we'll ever be able to explain the fast track friendships we developed at Duke. Jett has a lot of people that love him and that has been very evident thus far.

I am not going to lie though, the drive from home to REX and back is much closer and very short. With such a programmed daily excursion to Durham and back, I cannot remember the month of April. I know that I've probably blocked a lot out, and for good reason. It's very nice to be able to park for free, drive home in ten minutes, and have our own room. My guess is that this Wednesday or Thursday, we'll be making that drive with our little boy!

Temporary Home @ REX

So I know it's been a while since I last posted and for that I apologize! After the transfer from Duke University to REX, our arrival was unsettling at first. The four very large men that transferred our little guy said that he had a slight 'brady' on the way, but brought himself out of it before they had to "stim" him.... another pit in my stomach.

Joel was standing outside REX in the circle drive, waiting for our fleet to arrive. Since they told us we were transporting at noon and we didn't actually arrive until 11pm, poor Daddy was waiting there almost the entire time. Thank God Mac, Kim and Dexter live near by and Joel was able to take a little break in the evening. I was told later that he was a nervous wreck, we all were.

As we pulled up, I jumped out to be with Jett and Joel and Grandma took over and parked the car. We followed the flight team and Jett into the lobby at REX and received gasps from the other families waiting in the lobby. Once they had us in his room, his nurse Rosemary was very gentle and sympathetic to our eventful day. Of course they had to assess him, and he began to cry, louder than ever before. I was crying. Joel had tears in his eyes and was watching me as if asking if Jett was alright. When I was able to hold his hands again, Joel and I both let him know we were with him and that everything was going to be okay, as if we knew.

Jett finally calmed down and fell asleep. Joel and I said, "Goodnight" and met my mom down in the lobby. At 3am, we pulled in our driveway and we all went to bed.

Grandma's Coming

Wednesday was going to be a busy day. With Grandma Siegert arriving at 10am, I had planned to pick her up at the airport and take her straight to Duke to see Jett. Our plans were to stay with him until 4-ish, come home to see Joel, and stay home that night to work on the nursery while Joel had another "boys' night" with Jett.

Plans Changed!

My mom called around 9:30 and said that her plane had changed gates and she missed the announcement. She wasn't going to get to Raleigh until 5 o'clock unless she could get on standby. I decided to go to the hospital instead and just leave for the airport from there, depending on when she would land.

The morning started out great! Jett's OT therapist came and discussed introducing the breast and the bottle towards the end of the week. She said he was doing great and that he was ready to begin. Within minutes of her walking away, Dr. Izaat slowly approached our temporary spot. She didn't even have to say anything. I knew. We had to go. I asked her when she thought it would happen. She said within the hour. It was only 1 o'clock. My mom sent me a text and said she was able to get on the standby flight. She would be landing at 2 o'clock. OF COURSE!

I asked the doctor to please postpone the transfer at least until 6pm so that Joel could be here too. She said she would try, but couldn't guarantee anything. I left to get my mom and told her that our daily plans were now very different.

For the rest of the day, my mom and I were at Duke literally watching the double doors all day for the men in blue suits to come for Jett. Thank God she was with me, because I was a nervous wreck. Joel was already at REX, scoping it out and waiting for his son. Talk about pins and needles....we were just settling down in the NICU and then another bomb drops.

The Flight Team finally arrived at 10pm Wednesday night. My heart stopped. I knew that in a few moments, our son would be taken away from me again.

Let's just get home...

Joel and I were driving home Tuesday night, after Jett's friend had "coded". The traffic was backed up at 11:30pm because of an accident. As we came up on the scene, we saw a car crushed by a semi. Joel held my hand and said, "Let's just get home."

Scary Truth

Tuesday afternoon, one of the doctors from Duke called. She said that a bed had opened up at REX (hospital in Raleigh) and wondered if we would like to transfer. I asked her if we had a choice. She said "Well, yes. That's why I'm calling." Without hesitation, I said that we wanted to STAY PUT! We have gone through enough and Jett was doing well...why change things if we don't have to???? I had a feeling that we would have to go soon...and the worrying began.

On Tuesday night, Joel and I were tucking Jett in and saying "Goodnight" when the alarms began to sound. One of his little roommates that we have been with since the beginning, choked while eating and stopped breathing! All of the doctors came running into the TCN ready to go into rescue mode. As we stood over Jett, holding his hand, we watched the other mother run into the hallway, crying. The doctors were able to save him, but then it hit me...that could be us.